Dear  ,
I could look up you name in the job posting but I am writing so many applications that I keep loosing track of the hiring responsible.
Anyways, I thought the position sounds interesting. I would love to write something outstanding about my perfect fit. But your job posting reads exactly the same as all the others. I don’t really know how to make my cover letter special but I know I am the right one for the role.
And my fit for the company? 100%. Because you have a great company culture and you focus on people. I am a great human being.
I have exactly the years of experience you are asking for. No matter what I have taken away from these years or not. I have them. Trust me.
Of course I can work with all the weird internal tools and systems which you developed yourself. Nobody else uses them but I hacked into your company network to find out that they have the same features as the common ones on the market.
You do project management completely different? Well, then you are doing it wrong but I am happy to learn it your way.
In all your e-mails to follow I will overlook the myriad typos and grammar mistakes. You insist me to be fluent in three languages while you cannot properly communicate in one.
You will most probably call me out of the blue to ask me numerous questions and cannot answer one business related question yourself. That’s okay. I know you are working on several hiring processes in parallel. And I can relate to that.
I’ve several other application processes ongoing and as soon as you tell me where I am on your shortlist, I am happy to share details about my processes as well.
Yours faithfully,
One in a million
PS: You might have other open positions and you will ask me for which role I fit best. With all the cold calls, online tests, un/structured interviews and case studies you will put me through – why don’t you tell me?